Ways to Help People with Addictions

Change the Pattern

If someone can't stop smoking, find out where he buys his packs. Then get him to commit to buy them somewhere else. If he buys cases, make him buy only one at a time. Too much eating? Have them binge on carrots or spinach - something that they are not used to. It teaches them that they have control over their addiction.

Talk Bubbles for Pornography

Cut out talk bubbles (like used in cartoons) and write religious sayings on them from the girls, e.g., I am a daughter of Heavenly Father, I love him and he loves me; I'm a child of God; I am only going to marry a returned missionary; I love to see the temple. I'm going there some day. Have them put it on computer screens. Don't make the promise to stop watching, but to change how they watch.

The talk bubble next to the person whose body they are viewing makes it more difficult to keep viewing that individual as a sex object. They are then in more of a position to appreciate such people for who they are: beloved children of our Father in Heaven. This process encourages us to view individuals from the widest-angle lens possible, instead of from a narrow perspective focused on the single dimension of body parts or sexual acts.

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Helping Someone Stop Themselves

Determine task least enjoyed around the house. Think of negative consequences in engaging in pad behavior, e.g., guilt, loss of self-respect, wasted time, potential job loss if he were to be caught at work, interference with his progress toward marriage, problems in a future marriage, and the eventual escalation of such behavior into sexual involvement with other people. Person writes out check to be donated if you don't follow the new rules for the bad behavior. The new rules are (using masturbation as an example):

Step One: You must engage in your most disliked chore for thirty minutes. (Think about the advantages of this strategy: even if you later go on to masturbate, at least you will have a clean bathroom!)

Step Two: If you still want to masturbate, break out the list of negative consequences and read over it, imagining each item on the list as vividly as you can.

Step Three: If you still want to masturbate, go into the bathroom, lock the door, and take off your clothing, one item at a time, folding each one neatly as you go, until you are completely naked.

Step Four: Then, if you still want to masturbate, you can begin. However, once you begin, you must continue non-stop for at least a half-hour.

Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D.